Preface: these words spring from my own experience and my own views. they are are not meant to condemn or put down one way or another. Or even to suggest that someones preference is better than another's. And try not to read into anything too much, I try to say what I mean and I don't point fingers by way of exclusion. If I don't say it, then I don't mean it. anywhore - I'm just spurred to start a discussion, perhaps with myself, and with any who would enter it about...well, you'll see.
Rules to live by- Avoid using words like 'go back' or 'revert' 'unruly' 'wild' since it implies that one state of being is less than, or more primitive than the other.Do not let one's self be defined by the state of it. Whether treated, dyed, thrown into the fire, looking sleek and shiny - or brazenly bouffant, one does not equal it. It does not define a person. It is used as a mode of expression by the wearer. Not the other way around.
Is it a simple fact of being foriegn both the the wearer and those who see it? Is it just something we all have to get used to?Does it have to be something to be differentiated by?Time was , here in America, when leaving it in it's natural state WAS a sign and a symbol of defiance, of non-conformity, of not buying into the mass idea of what beauty is and of what it means to be quote on quote mainstream.
This came with an automatic negative connotation. To see it untamed meant that the wearer was one not to be messed with, one who had their own set of rules, one who in a sense wanted to be isolated from people unlike them. But IS that what it means today? I think it does set one apart and give one a stigma of non-conformity. But I also think it is a somewhat untapped resource for those who would try something new, to explore
what am I talking about? why, our hair, of course. I think it is so difficult for Black Women to wear their hair naturally is such a struggle, because it is only within the last year that we've really seen Black hair portrayed even minimally, and positively on television and in movies. I think that it, unfortunately, takes a leap of thought to connect beauty with the audaciousness of a natural head of Black Hair. But to whom?
I'll be the first to admit that for me as a Black woman, and I'd venture to say to many of us, since i cannot speak for Black Men, it's a difficult concept to accept. I know that, going natural, though it can be significantly healthier for the hair, though it IS the way that God chose to design my hair, and it IS beautiful in it's glorious right...was a very difficult transition. I could not accept the thought of an afro on top of my face. I could not think that this is anything but...i hate even to type it, primitive. why? it's a part of me, it's how my hair was designed. And it's gorgeous, as are many other derivatives and hairstyles. so where does this deep dislike come from?
I am not one to throw blame on the media and on the way society has shaped my mind and my ideals so that i have no way to tell what I'm being fed from what I think and feel of my own volition. I will, however, say this...
Beauty, as I recognize and appreciate it, and as it pertains to this discussion, comes in at least two veins...
1) that which I have gathered and appreciated through various media - magazines, it's being worn or shown on people I've seen, tv, etc. - is popular, in style... that is to say that beauty or fashion (which includes hairstyles) is generally seen as universally beautiful. That which if anyone saw it, could hardly deny there being some trace of aesthetic pleasure you were experiencing. we can call it traditional beauty.
2) there is that beauty that which I decide is beautiful to me, regardless of its value to others. Sometimes it's a combination of traditional beauty and a je ne se qua, as the french would say, that something else that takes hold of my heart and draws me in, or a total absence of traditional beauty. For example a lot of times, a gangly artist can appear much more physically attracitve by virtue of his or her talent because it speaks to something deeper, something mysterious that urges one to learn more about them. That which often points toward much more than being formed well, or taking care of one's appearance, it's a radiance that shines and draws other kinds of beauty and creativity to it. We can name it as atypical beauty.
My sense of traditional beauty never featured Nubian princesses with coils of jet black hair atop a fine sculptured face. My sense of beauty was full of sheened, pressed tresses. Hair that IS beautiful, but is far from what actually grows from my head. That sounds so basic. So foundationally stupid. But that's a thought, straight from my head onto this computer screen. a question that it feels silly to even ask, but nonetheless escapes my lips is, why isn't my hair beautiful? unspoken addendum to that sentence,...to me. why isn't it beautiful to me? I've had numerous people of my race and outside say how gorgeous they think an afro is, how jealous they are of how elegant it looks. really? the grass is always greener right? Now don't get me wrong, this is not the only thought running through this maze of words in my head. As I"ve gotten used to it, it is quite mesmerizing. So tightly coiled, so dark, so sure of it's shape. It's amazing!
why then do i feel like it's an ALTERNATIVE type of beauty? like it's almost second best. God didn't think so, why should i? Back and forth, back and forth.
It's beautiful.
It's ugly.
It's gorgeous.
I hate it.
I LUV IT!!!
that's the way it goes i guess. any comments and thoughts are welcome. here ends part 1 of the hair chronicles.
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